Just Great

Wollongong was amazing. Can I go back?

Returning my focus

My week has pretty much been filled with the most (self-inflicted) stress. Really, I was asking for it. Being in such an intense program and then totally slacking off. But then on another level, I only slacked on one assignment. And that has affected the subsequent 4 assignments. #IHAVESIXFORTHISSUBJECT
Anyways, long story short. I have pretty much been having a week that's straight up shit. I feel no motivation whatsoever to do anything at all. And my deadlines are creeping up at a faster pace than ever. Oh well, silver linings? I just have 2 more weeks. Bad news? I have just 2 week left!! And I still need to study for finals. So, 2 weeks to finish 6 assignments(5 in the first week) and then study for 4 subjects? God, you've got my back right! I can do this. #IpraythatIcan

The main reason for this post though is to remind me that even through this all, I've got pretty amazing friends :) From giving me brownies to hugs and virtual ones. Ju just made my day. xxxxoooo. And I shall be waiting patiently for the mail to come the coming week or so. :D So super excited mannn. Much cryptic eh. Just the way I roll. HAHA. So, be thankful is all I can say. Be thankful, self. You've got it good and you will not realize it without times like these.

Salut,
-clare

Things I Am Thankful For

Soooo, I turned 21. In lieu of a weird birthday post, I decided to list out somethings I'm thankful for. Because, what could be better?

1. Family. Sometimes it's the only thing that gets me through life. Family may come with it's ups and downs, but they're the one part that you can't completely scare away no matter how hard you try.
2. God. Who gave me this family. Who gives me all the things I need at the moment I need it. He knows what I want and what I need, and knows also that not all that I want and need are tryly what I need. God, who is so humourous in his ways, I can't help but laugh at the things that happen to me. Good and bad.
3. Friends. For such awesome and badass friends. From the time I was in high school, I lucked out in the friends department, with a huge group of friends who were(still are) as crazy as I am. Moving on to college in Penang; from orientation to my first class, to drama and right up till my last presentation, I have met so many amazing people and became such close friends with em. With such an awesome time in Penang, I didn't think that Subang would in anyway have anything else to offer me. But I was wrong, and I've met some amazing people here as well. It has been wicked awesome thus far, and I hope I have been as good a friend to all of you as you all have been to me.
4. The gift of reading. I meet so many people who know not of the joys of this. I hope that one day they understand it. Because there is nothing more interesting than having an insiders view of another person's life. Don't tell me no one has ever wanted to see things from another person's view, like literally! (or literary in this case. HAHA)
5. The fact that my parents never held my "freedom" in their hands till I turned 21. I was essentially allowed to decide for myself when and what was appropriate. Hence, there is no key to give on my 21st. HAHA. Even my dad said this today: "I have no key to give, because you've had it from the start."
6. Having opportunities in my life to explore who I am and who I want to be very early in my life. This has probably made me an irritating specimen of a person. 
7. For being strong. In more ways than the eye can see, in more ways than the heart knows. For being strong enough to not leave my emotions separate from myself. To be strong enough to be weak.
8. For having lived this long. And also, all the people I have met who have touched my life and are no longer here. The memories may grow dim but every so often, there will be something what will light them up. Something that will make me smile and think of you. Particularly grandma, because you were the best and I see you in so many ways and in so many people around me. 

Heres to hoping I continue to grow(not physically I hope) and learn with each (Birth)day :D

Salut,

-Clare

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Mental Thoughts

So, I've not updated my blog for a long time. I've had ample time to do so, but I just didn't. I didn't have any classes since I finished my very last finals in July. Granted, I had my FYP in August. But that ended, the first week of December. So what have I been up to? Well I could say nothing. But that wouldn't be quite accurate. The past 3 months have flew by in such a blur, I'm left with nothing but worry.

A breakdown of what happened:
I GRADUATED WITH A DIPLOMA IN IT, YO! :D
I shifted out of Penang :'( #criedadamnriver #stillmissingitlikecrazy #MEMORIESFORLIFE

I went Caroling, the usual.
I ATE AND ATE AND ATE!

Christmas, New Year and CNY, (one after another) you are the best gift to any Malaysian who loves food.
I visited Penang twice! Would have actually stayed there the whole time, if it didn't require me annoying one of my awesome peeps, everyday. (Thanks Xander, Mars(and Chun!) and Val who put up with me on separate ocassions) HAHA.
My Penang trips, with the last one ending on Friday. They make me so sad that I've left the island. Special shoutout of immense thanks to Jin Ji for being an amazing amazing friend who haz carrrrr, and is willing to drive! Glad we finally got that beer :) Also, Leigh! For being an awesome cousin, and having drinks(and buying rootbeer from KL for me), eating cake and having supper together(I love it that we can always eat at any time). Not forgetting, for also being le driver! Val for letting me crash at her place and basically coax you into eating this and that and going out with me and my friends. Twas fun! :)

I visited Subang and KayHELL to kinda settle my transfer and housing(insert main source of stress).

I built a website for La Salle Malaysia(still putting in material, but it's basically done with the design! Might even put up the link here, if I'm really happy with my work. HEH)

I slept like 6-10 hours a day, depending on how late/how early I did stuff.

I avoided meet up, I had meetups. But mainly I stayed at home and chilled.
Stayed at home, hoping that I wouldn't need to leave. Sigh. But the time for leaving is almost upon me. I have to attend my orientation this Friday. Yes, I'm not cool enough to skip orientation. Also because I have no idea where is whattttt in Subang. I really really really pray that I can find a good set of friends within my own course, people who are nice and smart(that is all I ask). I don't even care if they're funny, or if they'll get my lame puns. (That would be a plus) BUT ALL I WANT IS SOME GOOD PEOPLE WHO WON'T BACKSTAB ME OR TAKE ADVANTAGE OF ME. *fingers crossed*


Notice how I only blog when I'm at my busiest. Sigh. So that means you'll be seeing tons of updates. That is if anyone still reads blogs? HAHA. Well, with Facebook I think not.

Anyways, TTFN and DFTBA!
Salut,
-Clare

First day of a last chapter.

"I'm a a ship sailing and the seas are rough
I'm a satellite in the space above
When I'm holding here
Or I'm hanging up
In the suspension"

We'll see how the epilogue turns out. Because then only will we know how this ends.

Technically, today is the first day of this semester. Meh. But I'm still in Ipoh, because my enrollment day is tomorrow. So I'll be travelling back to Penang today! Oh the joy of the Island and the sadness of not being home. All you college/uni people will get this mixed feelings I always always experience.

So, Idk why the heck I've been feeling so 'lost' in the mind sector. I need to get my shit together and figure out what I want/need to do for my final year project, which is to be complete during this semester. Yeah, no classes whatsoever this sem, just the project! (Which I've yet to decide on it's content or my advising lecturer.) Damn, damn, damn. ANDDDD, on top of that, I need to figure out which IT sector I wanna major in for my degree next year.

Which also leads to the source of my lack of decision making. The fact that this is my final semester means I leave Penang and say goodbye end of this year :'( Which makes me have slight anxiety as I've called it home for close to 3 years?(Okay, maybe 2 1/2 years!) And I really really love Penang. It has so much to offer and so much more, I can tell. *SIGHS*

But we all need to move on, close old chapters and open new ones in other places and spaces. Subang would be the next destination! Not the biggest fan of KL and it's surroundings. Meh. I don't even know where is what. Lack of interest in knowing, stemmed from the lack of like.

Several things to look forward in Subang though:
like being housemates with Daniel!!
and also having older people around?
(The no 1. problem in Penang is that the bulk of students are from Pre-U programs, which ultimately mean they're younger than me. Ish betul one. At least in SU, there will be a mixture due to the bulk of Aussie degrees being only available here.)

Here's what I'm probably gonna dread in SU:
food?(either the lack of good food or the price of food)
having to introduce yourself to everyone
(ALSO, having to judge college activities and picking which ones would mesh well with me. Though, I told Daniel to join and scout which clubs are interesting and nice to join. Hopefully he gets good intel!)
and finally, having to start over again in a new college in a new city.

It's scary how we're pushed into places we'd not normally go, but after it's over and you look back, you thank God that you were pushed there, to help you grow and to help enhance your perspective of things. I'm not ready to say goodbye to Penang, but I'm sure God's just laughing at my senseless worrying and saying "You'll know what's in store for you, soon enough".

Salut,
-clare ;)

Busy Busy Busy

How is it that the only time I feel like updating my blog is at the most busiest times? HAHA. I have drama coming up, (which I'm super hyped up and worried for at the same time!) a website due tomorrow and my finals a week after drama. In other news, I'm almost doneee! One more semester of only my FYP :P Which is probably gonna be a killer :/

 So, drama. I like that I'm the narrator who's just damn 'kepoh' in every scene. And oh, the teasing I get from having a good looking co-narrator. I pity him more than me. :/ I think he could do with better teasing? (Sorry, I'm insecure like that.) AND, Mars(my roommate) and I managed to get our drama lecturer to agree to a grey dress, instead of a white dress for narration part. I just don't think I could have pulled a female Morgan Freeman in a dress. HAHA. That would be weirdddd.

 I feel the urge of creating a list of some sort. :) Maybe awesome new artist? Wait, does anyone still check my bloggie? HAHA. I hope so. HEH.

 Salut,
-Clare ;)

Because the Past is the Past and I wouldn't change a thing :)

"So my semester break has finally begun and it's for a whole month. Since it's a whole bloody month and I have not managed to secure a job of any sort, I shall finally update my blog, cos I haven't done that this whole year. I should be given two slaps, since I've had ample time to do so. Anyways, let's move away from my failure to blog and think of other stuff. One thing I haven't done in a bit is blog about artist and music stuff. :/ Haha. I need to do something about that soon." As you can see from this post, I started writing it at the start of my break. That break, which is already coming to an end. I resume classes next week. The only thing I'm looking forward to is being back at the apartment and hanging with my homies. It's amazing how fast Mars and I have become such good friends. Maybe it's cos we're both equally weird. I take that back, she's weirder. But that's why I love being homies with her. And Ruve! The more studious of the 3 of us. ;) Love being homies with her too. Between the liking for shows and movie marathons of the 3 of us and le bro, we pretty much mesh very well. :) I think the selling point was when I found out all of us love Supernatural.